Usually, my wife and I believe that we’re being spied on by
the cartoonist who draws the syndicated comic strip “Arlo and Janis.” Everything from Janis’s multitasking on
her cellphone to Arlo’s approval of his wife’s sleepwear and his attentiveness
to his cat seems to have been lifted straight from our domestic life. Some days we wonder whether the strip
has pirated our identities or whether we are actually stealing from the
cartoonist’s script.
This past March and April, though, we were sure that the
creator of another syndicated comic strip, “Stone Soup,” had her spy cam
trained on us.
In fact, that spy cam followed us to Paris where, just like
the couple in that strip, Joan and Wally, we were looking for a brief release
from our wonderfully ordinary suburban life. We wanted to step out of the comfortably familiar and slip
into something more . . . romantic.
But also something more adventurous. With the college tuitions for our three daughters pretty
much behind us, we were ready to embark on the midlife version of their study
abroad programs in a foreign language in a foreign land. By some lucky alignment of the planets,
we were able to put on hold our life in Milton and environs and live for two
full months like Parisians.
My wife’s life as a Parisian involved taking French language
classes every morning. Mine
involved the all-American fantasy of trying to imitate Ernest Hemingway, who
described looking out over the roofs of Paris and thinking: “All you have to do
is write one true sentence. Write
the truest sentence that you know.”
Bon chance!
But in some ways our life was as touristy as Joan and
Wally’s. We visited museums and
churches. We took long walks along
the Seine. Time even slowed down
the way it does in a comic strip.
(The characters in “Stone Soup” have aged only two years in the two
decades that the strip has existed.)
After all, we had no pressing responsibilities. I thought about buying a clarinet and
learning to play “La Vie en Rose” for coins on the Metro. Some days our Parisian life seemed no
more “real” than those comic strip characters who appeared to be imitating us
step by step.
But what made it “real” was the adventure—well, the
challenge—of getting through every day in a language in which neither of us was
fluent. Rising to that challenge
made us feel more vital and more energetic than we had for years. We actually felt younger. Whether reading street signs or
ordering “Le Carnivore” in a crêperie,
we had to be constantly alert, engaged, tuned in. Very early in our stay, my wife managed to explain to a cordonnier that she needed a boot heel
repaired. Eventually—bizarre!—we began to dream in French.
But even the best dreams end with a wakeup call, and despite
our total immersion in our adopted city, we knew after two months that we were
still strangers in a strange land.
We were foreigners. We had
funny accents, limited vocabulary, and mangled grammar. Most days we were humbled by our
linguistic inadequacy.
But we were never humiliated, and one lasting souvenir—the French word for memory—we brought home with us relates to our attempt to realize the American dream of assimilation and acceptance while living in Paris. Parisians are legendary for their abruptness, their rudeness, their indifference. We found them patient, good-humored, and friendly, the way everyone should be to strangers and foreigners in their midst. They helped us to live our dream.
But we were never humiliated, and one lasting souvenir—the French word for memory—we brought home with us relates to our attempt to realize the American dream of assimilation and acceptance while living in Paris. Parisians are legendary for their abruptness, their rudeness, their indifference. We found them patient, good-humored, and friendly, the way everyone should be to strangers and foreigners in their midst. They helped us to live our dream.